Twin bed mattress
Get bunk bed
Make work bench tool area
Hang pictures
Finalize home and money agreement
Finalize budget
Update income and donations/tithe
Give away stuff don’t want or need
Paint
Move forward with home making
Make risers to put under Ama’s bed and roll bed under that for Azri to sleep in or sleep two directions
Find what the kids love and do it – Ava dance – even YouTube
Ama sewing
—– Need to change and address —–
I want to let them vent, but it needs to be such that I don’t get riled up. So I need to be able to be calm and clear, set expectations and follow through.
You may calm down and communicate respectfully, or you may give yourself some time in your room to calm down.
Explain this at a calm time, then follow through.
Can they destroy things?
Room not a punishment but a place to calm and collect themselves to be able to communicate respectfully.
If they don’t go on their own, I will help them go to calm. (Maybe outside is better – especially for Ama)
It is not to avoid addressing something, but to calm so the communication can happen.
“Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.”
I’ve been noticing that we have not been communicating respectfully to one another and I have an idea or plan on how we can work on that.
When you have an idea for me or you disagree or you don’t like something, your response must always be from respect anyway. Your job is to obey and if you also want to ask or offer suggestions or share your thoughts be sure you are in a calm place to communicate that respectfully. There are times that we need to collect ourselves, calm, and ask for God to help us. This may mean you step outside for a minute or walk to your room. Sometimes I need space too and sometimes I can’t leave what I’m doing to go take a walk or go to my room even if I want to, so I sometimes need you each to give me some space to allow me to calmly and respectfully communicate with you the way I want to. SO, sometimes, I will help you to take care of yourself and sometimes I will ask you to help me take care of myself.
Can we do that for each other? Can we love each other enough to help each other or help ourselves to be able to communicate in a calm respectful way because we love each other?
I really DO want to hear your thoughts and opinions, even if you have an idea of how we could do something different and I’m even ok with you telling me that you don’t like something. However, it needs to be done with respect.
We have a model of this in scripture with Abraham pleading before God for Sodom and Gomorrah. God listened. Abraham was respectful. In the end God made the decision. In the end Abraham respected that God was in charge and God sees and understands more from his vantage point. This is a model for us. Be respectful, share opinions and ideas, but then trust that mom and dad are making decisions we believe are absolutely best and we are seeing from a different vantage point. As with God in that scenario, we have greater responsibility over the big picture, so we must make the final decision. And, as with Abraham, you need to trust that we are doing what we understand us best and respect that.
We all want to be in charge, but we can’t always be. God is in charge. He is my leader. And He has asked me to be your leader. And you are leaders to those younger and those around you. We all want to be the best leader. That requires respect, but also making the best choices even if those who you are leading don’t like it.
For example, Adi, you are a leader over Azri in some ways. If you were outside and he was about to hurt himself with Granddad’s tool or running in the street, would you stop him even if he didn’t like it and got mad at you? Yes. Why? Because you love him and you understand what could happen better than he does yet.
Can we agree to work on this together? Since we will do this together, let’s hold hands together and pray together. If this seems hard and you don’t want to do it, we will keep praying and I would like to be a better and more supportive role model for you.
———– Sun. Message ———-
[False friends don’t show up when you need them most.]
Prov. 18
Galatians 4